Skip to main content

And so my anxiety begins .....

MONDAY OCTOBER 27TH 2014 @ 8:25pm: in bed watching 2 Broke Girls and eating chocolate mmmm lol

HOW I FEEL: tired .... stressed out .... exhausted

Sooooo like the title of my blogspot states .... My anxiety for my 1 Year checkup has begun.  I know right? 1 year already since my surgery and since I was told I officially kicked Cancers Ass #screwyousarcoma #youwillneverwin.  My appointment is next Tuesday - bloodwork, X-ray and appointment with Dr. Ghert....the usual process.  For some reason my anxiety seems higher because I really want to say I've been 1 year Cancer free.  I just get so worked up and I ask myself if these appointments will EVER get easier,  I'm told not really .... The anxiety gets less and less but never fully goes away.  Awhile back I had joined this Facebook group for individuals that have or had chandrosarcomas .... In the beginning it seemed pretty awesome, reading other people's stories (from all over the world) and sharing mine and sharing success stories but then in the last week or so it seems to have given me increased anxiety and stress from reading statistics that people post and some horrible stories about individuals and the cancer coming back.  I decided to remove myself from the group because it wasn't worth reading unnecessary information.  I am going to stick to my rule from day one and trust in what my surgeon says.....and try my hardest to not stress over my cancer coming back until it actually does.  This appointment next week should be interesting because I am curious to see what Dr. Ghert says about me returning to work in January.  I think I've asked every appointment for the last 6 months or so lol!!!!!! 

So what have I been up to the last few weeks ..... Hmmmmmm ..... This past Friday I attended the Relay for Life at Laurier Brantford with 4 girls from my support group.  My sister goes to Brantford 
'Laurier and her and her friends organized and made this awesome fundraiser happen.  She asked if 
we would lead the survivor lap; of course we couldn't say no.  It turned out to be an amazing night, we of course didn't stay all night because we are old ladies bahahaha ...... Christine did an amazing speech and we were all proud of her for sharing her story infront of everyone.  Thank you ladies for coming .... Look forward to next year. 



I'm still working hard at physio 3x a week.  They are starting to pick on me more and push me past limits I never thought I could do.  Which is great, because the ultimate goal is to say BYE BYE to the cane and HELLO to walking with nothing

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

YACC Retreat and Munchie's Birthday :):)

MONDAY NOVEMBER 24TH 2014 @ 3:00pm: relaxing and going to pick Alyssa up from daycare shortly HOW   I   FEEL : tired I've been sitting here for the last half an hour or so staring at this computer screen trying to decide where to start with this blog post.  I have so much I want to share just unsure where to start.  I guess I'll start here ---- 7 days ago I got the privilege of attending the Young Adults with Cancer Retreat in Cobourg.  Dan and I got to spend 5 days there with a group of 35 AMAZING people.  I was a little unsure of what to expect going to this but after speaking with people who had attended prior retreats and told me it changed their lives completely, I knew I had to go and see it for myself.  The first day I found really intense; we sat in a circle all 35 of us and gave a brief introduction of ourselves and our journey.  I remember that night when I went to bed I thought to myself ‘holy shit, th...

Merry Christmas !!!!!

FRIDAY DECEMBER 19TH 2014 @ 9:15am: dropped munchie off at daycare and I'm relaxing on the couch with a Starbucks and watching a Christmas Movie HOW   I   FEEL : wishing this cold would go away, it's been almost 2 weeks and I think it's overstayed it's welcome lol ACTUALLY it never was welcomed haha I just realized I haven't updated my blog since Alyssa's birthday; that's over a month ago.  I'm horrible at keeping it up to date, I always say I promise I will get better at this but it hasn't happened yet.  Maybe in the New Year ???? I can't believe Christmas is NEXT WEEK .... it doesn't feel like Christmas at all; maybe that's because our weather has been so bizarre the last few weeks and we don't have any snow.   I've been doing a lot of thinking the last few days about where I was last year and how far I have come.  This is a special Christmas for me because I get to be home with my family and Christmas morning I can...

Why Me?

Why Me?  This is still a question I ask myself quite often, almost too often.  I've asked my oncologist from day one why me? Her response to me, there is no reason Laura why you got cancer, you didn't eat anything, you didn't do anything to get it.  This is the mystery of cancer, no one knows why people get it.  It's a horrible disease and I think I'm just starting to see how horrible it really is.  I have friends and family who are cancer survivors, I've spent a lot of time confiding in them and talking about my struggles.  My 2 friends who both are cancer survivors are the most positive people I know and a huge inspiration to me and when I'm having a rough time with things I turn to them.  One of them is my best friend who is a cancer survivor going on 9 years and another is a former coworker who also survived cancer and has been cancer free for 3 years.  It's not that I can't talk to other friends  or family about my struggles but sometime...